Who would have thought?

So there I was, talking about myself (because you asked!) and you decided to space out.
Intelligent input darling, why don't you just have another beer then?
Hmm who would have thought?
What's new?

I don't care about the how or why, just the what.
And guess what? You're screwed, irrevocably screwed.
Who would have thought it'd be so soon?

Should I be a little happy because you sounded relieved?
Who would have thought? *secretly pleased* No it's not a secret anymore :/